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Friday, December 15, 2006

maafkan samy.

had a lazy afternoon today. met a couple of friends for bubur kacang and we came out with a theory - that samy vellu is dead - long ago. the man is in fact - a government project.

'the samy vellu project'

the theory. - the man is a housing project. but not the typical government housing project - which is too vulgar to be mentioned for some. under this secret project which nobody knows (just like any other top secret government project in malaysia) - the body of samy vellu is used to house all of malaysian VIPs involved with scandals, corruption, court cases, murders, organised crimes, pornography - you know embarassing stuff like that. its like a 'witness protection' programme but not for witnesses since such thing does not exist in malaysia. this is why samy vellu is the second longest serving cabinet minister in malaysia. the first one is rafidah, but the one we see on tv now is not rafidah, itu pendua saja, the real rafidah also at times occupy the body of samy but most of the time, she is abroad watching broadway shows, you know stuff like that. when samy was alive, him and rafidah were quite close and in fact - pernah sekali Samy mengalu-alukan kedatangan Rafidah ke satu majlis pelancaran dan seterusnya meminta Rafidah merasmikan majlis itu dengan berkata;

"Dath-thokh Sri, ter-rema kassae ker-nha tel-lhah sud-dhi mae-rash-mikan majlis ini. Dath-thokh Sri, saekarang, silh-lha laa itu kain kasi bukak! - and she did. (although such story has never been widely published before).
the samy vellu project started in 1979 but was just in its planning stage then. it started to take form only a couple of years after that. believe it or not, it first started when in the year 1979, Manickavasagam the then MIC President died suddenly - which suddenly gave Samy a chance to gain a toe-hold as the Acting President - however, the MIC party was in ruin at that time and the government was quite worried with the situation.
at that time most middle class indians did not feel MIC as a representing party and that it was only relevant with issues of the working class. with subramaniam on the opposing side, things were not so sunny for samy. with the help of RTM, MIC came out with a pilot SITCOM entitled "Suddenly Samy" starring - Samy himself which was targeted at middle class Indians in an effort to garner their support - it failed miserably. a couple of other projects to bring unity in MIC also failed that the government by then got a big headache.
years go by and the government kept monitoring closely samy and his MIC's development. not long after that, samy won the MIC election upon which he started to overhauld MIC - cleansing the party from any opposition even up to the deepeest. grassroot - (the tea lady of the MIC office who hated him so much that time)
at that point the government felt samy is tad too dangerous. they felt that in the future samy might even challenge the prime minister himself. something needs to be done.
after a cabinet meeting in which samy was left out purposely, the government decided to eliminate samy. - however musa hitam felt samy's influence and values of patriotism and gangsterism could be used - especially to control the already by then- feudal administration of MIC.
after a couple of signatures. samy was murdered.

how samy vellu died is yet to be determined and yet to be discussed but we believe he was murdered by a group of malaysian commandos - who were happy to do it due to one toll hike episodes. looking at the way malaysian commandos look, we believe samy died painfully.
among vips who have in the past used samy vellu as perumah include - thamby chik, muhammad taib, musa hitam, rafidah aziz, tun m, wan nor azlin and there was also rumour that razak baginda is going to use samy too.
this is the reason why we see samy vellu is often off center, often a failed linguist and all of the time 'cenoneng'. the (MRR2) being a notable example of this screwed up project (which is even cited in wikipedia) - in which samy adamantly reminded the public that the cracks were not due to design flaws and "nobody can simply open their mouth and suggest it is design flaw"
(Bernama 10 Aug 2004). however, findings from Halcrow Consultants Ltd suggested design deficiencies and the improper anchoring of the column rebar to the crossbeams were responsible for cracks(NSTP 1 Oct 2004). clearly, being an architect it was ridiculously impossible that that could have been samy speaking, it must have been someone else which we hope to find out before we die.
and now as for the latest 60% toll hike, we too believe it could have not been samy, being a minister for so long he must know what lies beneath the LDP and even what happen on it, during the day! what we could do now is to plead to the government to stop this samy project altogether.
whatever it is, maafkan lah samy, only lord muruga knows what's inside his body and what's operating his mind - grass cutter, tree cutter, hair cutter or bus conductor.

1 comment:

dazzledalie said...

siapakah pembikin wig projek samy velu ini?adakah dia rongak?? hahaha..